than him who conquers his enemies;
for the hardest victory is over self.”
–Aristotle
It’s been another up and down week. Except for yesterday, my eating is under good control during the day. Once again, at night, I end up eating things I hadn’t planned and mostly didn’t even want. I discovered that in the middle of the night when I’m not sleeping and I’m hurting, I just don’t care about my plan. I simply want some relief at that moment and though I know perfectly well that it’s not helpful, I eat it with this grumpy “I don’t care” voice going on in my head.
Of course, I do care. And I wake up in the morning regretting the night before. I swear today will be better. It often isn’t. I am afraid I’m moving into that downward spiral where I get depressed because I’m eating too much and eat too much because I’m depressed.
That’s the whole thing about addictions, isn’t it? Any excuse will do.
